Humor Thread

Discussion in 'Anything Goes' started by 34468 Randy, Sep 28, 2008.

  1. Lint

    Lint Well-Known Member

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  2. 34468 Randy

    34468 Randy Well-Known Member

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    A man placed some flowers on the grave of his dearly departed mother and started back toward his car when his attention was diverted to another man kneeling at a grave. The man seemed to be praying with profound intensity and kept repeating, "Why did you have to die? Why did you have to die?"

    The first man approached him and said, "Sir, I don't wish to interfere with your private grief, but this demonstration of pain is more than I've ever seen before. For whom do you mourn so deeply? A child? A parent?"

    The mourner took a moment to collect himself, then replied, "My wife's first husband."
     
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  3. BWeiss

    BWeiss Johnny Partseed

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    A husband and wife are shopping in their local supermarket. The husband picks up a case of beer and puts it in their cart. "What do you think you're doing?" asks the wife. "They're on sale, only $20 for 24 cans" he replies. "Put them back, we can't afford them" demands the wife.

    They carry on shopping. A few aisles farther on, the woman picks up a $40 jar of face Cream and puts it in the basket. "What do you think you're doing?" asks the husband. "It's my face cream. It makes me look beautiful," replies the wife. Her husband retorts: "So does 24 cans of beer and it's half the price."

    That's him, there in Aisle 5.

    [​IMG]
     
  4. Lint

    Lint Well-Known Member

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    Last edited: Oct 31, 2017
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  5. Lint

    Lint Well-Known Member

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  6. duccmann

    duccmann Insider

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    97 hand jobs, hope someone has workers comp for that wrist


    Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
     
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  7. 34468 Randy

    34468 Randy Well-Known Member

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    Maybe I should retire yet once again and start a new career path. This one seems much more satisfying don't you think?
     
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  8. BWeiss

    BWeiss Johnny Partseed

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  9. Lint

    Lint Well-Known Member

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    [​IMG]
     
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  10. cat0020

    cat0020 Active Member

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    [​IMG]

    Best hot dog in town? or you've had worse?
     
    Last edited: Nov 2, 2017
  11. Lint

    Lint Well-Known Member

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    Whiskey Tango Foxtrot???
     
  12. 34468 Randy

    34468 Randy Well-Known Member

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    That certainly gives new meaning to Special Sauce now doesn't it? Did she put ketchup on the dog to hide something?
     
  13. 34468 Randy

    34468 Randy Well-Known Member

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    You know that little thing you j=have in the back of your head that stops you from saying things you shouldn't say. yeah. Well. I got rid of mine.
     
  14. Lint

    Lint Well-Known Member

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  15. cat0020

    cat0020 Active Member

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    At least she checked it for pubs before serving it..
     
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  16. Nelix

    Nelix Active Member

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    Hope she washed her hands before handling that.
     
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  17. 34468 Randy

    34468 Randy Well-Known Member

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    I am sure glad my wife does not visit this site!. I would never hear the end of this seeing is was me who started this thread. Keep them cumming....er coming.
     
  18. Lint

    Lint Well-Known Member

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  19. Lint

    Lint Well-Known Member

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    "Waiter, my hotdog smells like fish"
     
  20. 34468 Randy

    34468 Randy Well-Known Member

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    Hey girl. Your snatch smells like a hot dog!
     
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