Ghost says, “Let’s learn about Man Talk!”

Discussion in 'Anything Goes' started by Ghost, Jul 21, 2009.

  1. Ghost

    Ghost New Member

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    Ghost says, “Let’s learn about Man Talk!”
    Oh yeah.

    Well here it is. By multiple requests….

    Ghost, what’s “Man Talk”?
    Man talk is the most common form of speech from a Man to a female. At times, this speech can cross over into male on male conversations, but it is usually frowned upon, and will turn into a different level of Man Talk.
    Different levels?!? Do you mean there are different levels of Man Talk?
    Absolutely. There are actually 4 levels of Man Talk. I will list them, and give a brief description.
    Level one Man Talk – The aspiring Man Talker, aka the Wannabe. These men are usually found around level three Man Talkers in their common habitat or favored drinking hole. A level one Man Talker is in complete awe of the skills, to the point of having a Man Crush. These preemie Man Talkers will mimic other Man Talkers. They are usually either not in a relationship with a woman, or they are in a relationship with a Female Man Talker… (see Butch Woman)
    [​IMG]
    Higher level Man Talkers are rather sympathetic or cruel to level one Man Talkers. The ratio of cruel to sympathy is usually about 50% and can change at the drop of a hat…. Or if beer is involved, is 100% cruelty as the lower level Man Talker is usually used for bait or butt of jokes…the Shy Guy
    [​IMG]

    Most common phrase for level one Man Talkers
    Phrases to men:
    “HA! That’s so cool!”
    “Awe man, that’s awesome, my girl would…(fill in blank here)”
    “I wish I could tell that bitch….”
    “You guy(s) are awesome”

    Phrases to women:
    <BLANK>

    Level two Man Talkers are guys who like to drink, admire themselves and their manhood, appreciate their place in life and usually are in a relationship of some kind. A good example of a level two Man Talker is a man who has some of the easier to come by man toys… I.e. motorcycles, guns, a dog, decent stereo, fishing equipment etc. The majority of men live in this level. Few get out. These Man Talkers know how to talk to women, and generally keep good friendships with them. Sometimes called “the cute guy” or “the nice guy”. These guys often get lost in the “friend-zone”…. Being a nice guy has a very good chance of limiting a Mans play, and could eventually lead him to be called Creepy, or a pervert on occasion.
    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]
    Most common phrases for level two Man Talkers
    Phrases to men:
    “Hey guys, sup?”
    “Heh, Ive done / have that”
    “That’s cool, I think I may try that..”
    “yeah, my gals cool,…”
    “I can do pretty much whatever, just let me know”

    Phrases to women:
    “Hey, can I get that door for you?”
    “Hi, my names, (fill in name here), what are you doing here?”
    “You wanna get a bite to eat or something?, I got a spare helmet on my bike.”
    “Yes, I think you are attractive”
    “I love sex”

    Level three Man Talkers… The mans man. These are the guys who go hunting, fishing, weld shit just for fuckin fun… (often followed by shooting what they just welded, just to see what happens), beer drinkers, somewhat charismatic, and definitely outgoing personality… A man with confidence. Being wrong doesn’t phase this Man Talker, its simply shrugged off with a “meh”. These men have fantastic stories… true or not, they know how to captivate attention and hold it; a trait skill uses very often to lure in, trap, and hold a female… (Note the word woman, is seldom used now) Swearing is part of common vocabulary.
    Example:
    [​IMG]

    And yes, that is in fact a real Jack-alope in a star trek outfit. What?!? Don’t act like you don’t want one.

    Most common phrases for level three Man Talkers
    Phrases to men:
    “Yo”
    “yup”
    “you got that damn right!”
    “you better fuckin believe it”
    “HA, that’s horse shit”
    “STFU, I will kick your ass”

    Phrases to females:
    “Hey there darlin, what you up to?”
    “really!? I’ve been there. I went back in 2000. it was awesome, you should definitely go, the sights are really great”
    “you like that huh?, oh honey, I know you do”
    “whooo, did your tits just brush the back of my hand? I’m gonna need a moment”
    “you got a great ass”
    “ever been choked while fucking?”
    “damn you smell great”
    “I think you just made my pants tight….yup, you did”

    Finally the Level four Man Talker. The catch. Mr. The Man. These men are seldom seen in the daylight. They have the money, the toys, the chicks,.. everything a guy could want. These guys don’t ride motorcycles, They make them, ride em, and sell em.
    [​IMG]
    They are the level three Man Talker, but with less care, and more confidence. Often they are mistaken for not giving a shit.

    [​IMG]

    Common phrases of level four Man Talkers
    Phrases to men:
    “mmmhmm”
    “sup dude”
    <Ignoring another man>
    “sappenin”
    “hey biatch”

    Phrases to females:
    “hey baby”
    “damn you look fine”
    “you done with the dishes yet?”
    “lets go back to my place and check out the rest of you”
    “im done here, you commin with me?”
    “honey, you can wait on me any day”
    “get my beer”


    Now, lets see if you can spot the Man Talkers:

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]
    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]
     
  2. Ghost

    Ghost New Member

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    not to be confused with Man Talk

    He-Man - aka Homo.

    [​IMG]
     
  3. 02 VFR Rider

    02 VFR Rider New Member

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    is there a class to move up thru the levels??
     
  4. Ghost

    Ghost New Member

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  5. drewl

    drewl Insider

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    "weld shit just for fuckin fun… (often followed by shooting what they just welded, just to see what happens)"

    That's fucking awesome!

    Awe shit...
     
  6. Echo3Niner

    Echo3Niner New Member

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    Your score is (out of 60)
    43
    You are a man's man. Sure, you aren't exactly Mr. Sensitive but you can kick butt. Isn't that what is important? Now, go beat up Jean-Claude Van Damme and Steven Seagal.

    Hmmm, that goes with my Marine Vet motto I suppose: "Not as lean, not as mean, still a Marine."
     
  7. deepdish

    deepdish Banned

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    how does that make you feeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeel?????????????????
     
  8. 02 VFR Rider

    02 VFR Rider New Member

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    nice I got a 45 but need to work on it and get to 60
     
  9. crustyrider

    crustyrider New Member

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    56 out of 60

    Congratulations, you are a barbarian. The good news is that you are all man. The bad news is that you have been left off human evolution. You probably don't have an opposable thumb. Do not worry. Your species will discover fire in 30,000 years.


    uggg me need beer............
     
  10. Pliskin

    Pliskin New Member

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    LMFAO!

    I already knew I was a manly man, so I don't need no stinkin test.
     
  11. tbones86

    tbones86 New Member

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    38....
    manly with occasional bout's of sweetness, WTF
     
  12. Ghost

    Ghost New Member

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    Your score is (out of 60)
    36
    While your manliness dominates your personality, you occasionally break out into sweetness. You won't admit to liking Titanic in front of your guy friends, but you might occasionally shed a tear if that improves your chance of scoring with chicks.


    WTF!?!? NO I MOST DEFINITELY DO NOT!
     
  13. vfourbear

    vfourbear New Member

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    Level 5 Man talker.

    Special level that includes lawyers, certain businessmen, politicians, members of the media, and other theives. While often coming from backgrounds of privilege, many Level 5s do not, and is not necessarily a prerequisite for the category.

    These guys can talk so much shit that their lust for personal power can many times be nearly completely obscured by their altruistic catchphrases and sound bite bumpersticker talk. They may be easily identified by their near lack of hobbies or interests outside of those that either make them look good or get votes.

    Generally speaking, the most dangerous man talkers and are held to be responsible for most wars, bad economies, and the rise of feminism.

    Level 5s can be usually be easily indentified by the large numbers of hangers-on from the other categories in their immediate vicinity.

    Common Level 5 Phrases:

    Invest your money with us, we know what we're doing

    I feel your pain

    Mission Accomplished

    Any phrase with the words "value added" in it.


    I didnt take the Man test, cause I'm too manly for that shit.
     
    Last edited: Jul 21, 2009
  14. Ghost

    Ghost New Member

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    LOL bear, thats funny I was just lookin at this
    [​IMG]
     
  15. PyroMcnoob

    PyroMcnoob New Member

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    Your score is (out of 60)
    35
    While your manliness dominates your personality, you occasionally break out into sweetness. You won't admit to liking Titanic in front of your guy friends, but you might occasionally shed a tear if that improves your chance of scoring with chicks.

    well, dammit lol... I reckon I'm a lvl2 man-talker... lmao
     
  16. Spectre

    Spectre New Member

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    Copy-catting Mulletsgalore.com?

    Ghost,

    Your current as well as your previous attempts to be satirical and funny in describing stereotypes are strikingly similar to the now defunct but once hilarious Mullets Galore web site. I can't help wondering if you're trying in vain to copy and co-opt the unique humor and spoofing of the enigmatic creator of Mulletsgalore.com (who surely has a strong educational background in general biology) including the following similarities:

    1) Using the biological concept of 'taxonomy' (i.e., a classification of organisms into groups based on similarities according to their natural relationships and behavioral characteristics) in order to to group human stereotypes in a satirical manner;

    2) Further classifying and subdividing satirical stereotypes according to genus, species, and subspecies;

    3) Further describing, in a satirical fashion, each stereotypical type and subtype according to such things as natural habitats, characteristic behaviors, likes and dislikes, characteristic appearances, etc., as well as how to spot and identify these 'creatures'. Included here are illustrative photos as well as other photos which quiz and challenge the reader to correctly identify 'rare' photos and sightings of the stereotypical species in question.

    Ghost, what's NEW and ORIGINAL that you have to offer in terms of satire and comedy? :rolleyes:
     
  17. Ghost

    Ghost New Member

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    ROFL!! erm.. thanks?

    start with two quotes from Einstein himself... Since the comparison to attempted genius copy-cating (which the proposed irony is funny in itself)

    Retort one:
    Let's not be a looky-lue and apply banter to those who do, instead; make opposition of opinion a personal challenge and overcome via equal comepetition.

    Retort two:
    Just the thought of typing the word mullet... for any search of gained information... nope, havent done it, nor will I.

    There is no need to be disrespectful. Individuals who solace within the anonymity of the internet, only propel the resolution

    [​IMG]

    afterall, I think by your own classification definition, Ghost is subgrouped with
    I accept the compliment.
     
  18. 02 VFR Rider

    02 VFR Rider New Member

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    Lighten up Francis
    this thread is funny shit right here
    maybe you should check out Cross controling or counter steer thread
    linky
    http://vfrworld.com/forums/polls/24558-cross-controlling-counter-steering.html

    maybe your wisdom could help this poor soul.
     
  19. NorcalBoy

    NorcalBoy Member

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    Come on, who really has to take some interwebz test to know if they are a man or not?.....I took a piss this morning and can guarantee I didn't do it sitting down.......
     
  20. Ghost

    Ghost New Member

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    LOL Norcal. Dude I was just lookin at this picture too.
    [​IMG]
     
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