Humor Thread

Discussion in 'Anything Goes' started by 34468 Randy, Sep 28, 2008.

  1. VFR4Lee

    VFR4Lee Member

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    Aug 27, 2016
    Messages:
    754
    Likes Received:
    304
    Trophy Points:
    63
    Location:
    Reseda / LA
    Map
    Toddler: No Mom, I have to lay an egg.
    Hilarious pic. :D
     
    Lint likes this.
  2. Lint

    Lint Member

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    Aug 7, 2012
    Messages:
    4,737
    Likes Received:
    813
    Trophy Points:
    113
    Location:
    Simi Valley, Ca.
    Map
  3. 34468 Randy

    34468 Randy Member

    Country:
    Canada
    Joined:
    Dec 18, 2007
    Messages:
    12,348
    Likes Received:
    592
    Trophy Points:
    158
    Location:
    Chilliwack, BC Canada
    Map
  4. BWeiss

    BWeiss Johnny Partseed

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    Jul 1, 2008
    Messages:
    1,561
    Likes Received:
    84
    Trophy Points:
    88
    Location:
    Rancho Cordova, Ca
    Map
    An elderly golfer comes in after a good round of golf at the new course and heads straight to the bar/restaurant area of the club house. As he passes through the swinging doors, he spots a sign hanging over the bar that reads:

    COLD BEER: $5.00 HAMBURGER: $10.00 CHEESEBURGER: $15.50 CHICKEN SANDWICH : $18.50 HAND JOB: $250.00

    Checking his wallet to be sure he has the necessary money, the old golfer walks up to the bar and beckons to the exceptionally attractive female bartender who is serving drinks to a couple of sun-wrinkled golfers. She glides down behind the bar to the old golfer. ?Yes?" she inquires with a wide, knowing smile. "May I help you sir?" The old golfer leans over the bar and whispers, "I was wondering young lady, are you the one who gives the hand-jobs around here?" She looks into his wrinkled eyes and with a wide smile purrs, "Yes sir, I sure am." The old golfer leans in even closer and into her left ear says softly, "Well then, be sure to wash your hands real good, because I want a cheeseburger."
     
  5. BWeiss

    BWeiss Johnny Partseed

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    Jul 1, 2008
    Messages:
    1,561
    Likes Received:
    84
    Trophy Points:
    88
    Location:
    Rancho Cordova, Ca
    Map
  6. 34468 Randy

    34468 Randy Member

    Country:
    Canada
    Joined:
    Dec 18, 2007
    Messages:
    12,348
    Likes Received:
    592
    Trophy Points:
    158
    Location:
    Chilliwack, BC Canada
    Map
  7. Lint

    Lint Member

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    Aug 7, 2012
    Messages:
    4,737
    Likes Received:
    813
    Trophy Points:
    113
    Location:
    Simi Valley, Ca.
    Map
    Hey AM, looks like y'all need more teachers...

    FB_IMG_1525785246258.jpg
     
    Riding a 2000, OZ VFR and 34468 Randy like this.
  8. OZ VFR

    OZ VFR Insider

    Country:
    Australia
    Joined:
    Feb 25, 2013
    Messages:
    1,036
    Likes Received:
    260
    Trophy Points:
    128
    Location:
    Old Toongabbie, Australia
    Map
    I now have even less interest on visiting Kansas
     
    Lint likes this.
  9. FJ12rydertoo

    FJ12rydertoo Member

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    Mar 28, 2008
    Messages:
    1,766
    Likes Received:
    115
    Trophy Points:
    63
    Location:
    Platte City, MO
    Map
    Actually that sign would be in Kansas City, Missouri. In Kansas they don't tell you ahead of time. :)
     
    Lint likes this.
  10. Lint

    Lint Member

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    Aug 7, 2012
    Messages:
    4,737
    Likes Received:
    813
    Trophy Points:
    113
    Location:
    Simi Valley, Ca.
    Map
    Hahahaha
     
  11. Gator

    Gator Insider

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    Nov 29, 2012
    Messages:
    4,557
    Likes Received:
    560
    Trophy Points:
    143
    Location:
    Boynton Beach, FL
    Map
    cosby.JPG
     
    zombie and OOTV like this.
  12. OOTV

    OOTV Member

    Joined:
    Aug 20, 2011
    Messages:
    6,028
    Likes Received:
    660
    Trophy Points:
    143
    Location:
    Anaheim, Ca.
  13. Lint

    Lint Member

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    Aug 7, 2012
    Messages:
    4,737
    Likes Received:
    813
    Trophy Points:
    113
    Location:
    Simi Valley, Ca.
    Map
  14. Lint

    Lint Member

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    Aug 7, 2012
    Messages:
    4,737
    Likes Received:
    813
    Trophy Points:
    113
    Location:
    Simi Valley, Ca.
    Map
  15. Lint

    Lint Member

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    Aug 7, 2012
    Messages:
    4,737
    Likes Received:
    813
    Trophy Points:
    113
    Location:
    Simi Valley, Ca.
    Map
  16. Egg on Leggs

    Egg on Leggs New Member

    Country:
    United Kingdom
    Joined:
    Jun 1, 2008
    Messages:
    29
    Likes Received:
    6
    Trophy Points:
    3
    Location:
    Birmingham, UK.
    Map
    There were 2 old men sitting on the pier fishing.

    One old man said, "It's nice out here , isn't it",

    The other old man said, "Yes it is but you better put it away because there's a cop commimg".
     
  17. 34468 Randy

    34468 Randy Member

    Country:
    Canada
    Joined:
    Dec 18, 2007
    Messages:
    12,348
    Likes Received:
    592
    Trophy Points:
    158
    Location:
    Chilliwack, BC Canada
    Map
    It is really too bad dogs do not talk. I could be very happy if they did as I would not have to live around and listen to people.
     
  18. 34468 Randy

    34468 Randy Member

    Country:
    Canada
    Joined:
    Dec 18, 2007
    Messages:
    12,348
    Likes Received:
    592
    Trophy Points:
    158
    Location:
    Chilliwack, BC Canada
    Map
    Interviewer: Tell me about yourself.
    Me:
    I would rather not. I kinda need this job.
     
  19. duccmann

    duccmann Insider

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    Oct 6, 2010
    Messages:
    8,541
    Likes Received:
    488
    Trophy Points:
    113
    Location:
    SoCal
    Map
    Been saying it’s so nice I think I’ll leave it out for a good 30 years now


    Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
     
  20. Lint

    Lint Member

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    Aug 7, 2012
    Messages:
    4,737
    Likes Received:
    813
    Trophy Points:
    113
    Location:
    Simi Valley, Ca.
    Map
    FB_IMG_1526437269204.jpg
     
    OOTV likes this.
Related Topics

Share This Page