Tiger Tiger

redneck 1: This is depressing I need a beer and sumthin ta shoot!!!! shitfire gonna be a long winter....

redneck 2 : but wait bucky the sun, itsa comin out.......

redneck1: aww shitfire those dam JAPenese motorsicle riders isa gonnas be comin out soonfer ya knowed it.........


red neck 2: alrighty bucky I kin run fetch the scatter gun!1 we are fixin to have us a VFR for supper tonight!!!

 

Insert Roscoe P. Coltrain laugh here.

 

Where can I buy this suit?

 

Surfer dude# 1: DUUUDE what's that noise

Surfer dude# 2: What noise brah?

surfer dude#1: that high pitched whine and loud V-8 sound

surfer dude#2: dont know man, my ears are fulla water man

surfer dude#1: I think its that guy on that bike brah

Surfer dude#2: this is OUR beach man, he cant ride that thing here lets kick his ass

Surfer dude#1: yeah, we're the talent around here, lets go knock him off of it

Surfer dude#2: ok, let me get this leash off first

Surfer dude#1: I'm hungry dude, we'll take his money and get a burrito

Surfer dude#2: cool , if he aint a local, his ass is ours


Same dumbasses, different parts of the country

:biggrin:

 

all I was picturing diring this is that dumb ass stabard going head first into the rail posts. But he would at least be wearing a helmet

 

Damn, sounds like you've been thru BAD AXE MI., then name alone should tell the story.

 

Sounds like some dumbasses need to learn what CCW stands for..........

 

Wow you must work with Flight Attendants Also.

I swear this is a true story: I'm an airline pilot and while sitting at the gate boarding the passengers the flight attendant ask if we would like some coffee? I'm not a coffee drinker so I say "no thank you." The captain "yes, two creams two sugars." A few minutes later she brings the captains coffee and while he's drinking he says "man this is really good. I wonder what kind of creamer she used?"
When the FA came back the captain asked about the creamer she replies in a proud voice(I guess she's proud of her "ingenuity") That she was out of creamer and used BAILEY'S instead. That's right serving an alcoholic beverage to a pilot right before we leave the gate.
The captain just got up and walked off the airplane...I had to try to explain to her what she did wrong. She couldn't fathom that Bailey's alcohol in it because "it like taste like so good." Did you ever wonder why they store it in the liquor cabinet I asked?:crazy: Judging by her expression I had just completely blown her mind.
So long story short the flight got canceled she got fired...and these are the people who are supposed lead you from a dangerous situation in the event of an emergency.(I have my own exit in the cockpit:thumbsup: ;looks like you passengers are screwed.:tongue

 

Props( little plane joke there) to the pilot for being safe. Most folks woulda shrugged it off.

 

If you're knees bent the other way wtf would a chair look like?

 

So a guy with rollerblades attatched all over his body can outrun some douche on a Suzuki GS500 that wasn't even trying to go fast.....Damn the internet is great.





Apples!

 

Scintillating , wasnt it? I was riveted

 

I've got this impression of floating, being levitated.
It's like I'm swimming underwater.
My entire body feels numb.
It's the middle of the night, but it's light.
They have huge black omniscient eyes.
It's like they just look right through you.
They're running down their fingers down my back.
As if they're counting the vertebrae of my spinal column.
I'm thinking why am I here?
I wanna be one of them.
I wanna be one of me.
But I can't be both.
It doesn't matter anyway.
Cuz this white light came over me, and enveloped me.
And I blanked out.

Replicants

 

Did you eat at
Pho
King
Long
2
day?

 

Sayyy, why don't you geta toupee with some brains in it!
Moe Howard :biggrin:

 

i always wanted to be more visceral but my chrono accelerator is just hummin along like a little hummingbird heart.should i paint it blacker?

 

sure the blacker you paint it the faster it will go till it is moving so fast it looks like its standing still in which case you'll have to paint it a different color just so people can see thatit truely is moving and not something stationary

 

But never outrun your headlights.

 

Sooo are headlights photon generators or darkon absorbers....?